necro wrote:
Who ever came up with the advice "be yourself" is an absolute moron...
+1
Disagree. If you are not yourself, and fall in love with a girl. Once you are together, she'll find out who you really are. You can't hide forever. And if she finds out, the chance is high that she is not very pleased with that.
Necro, don't get me wrong, but as far as I know you, you try hard to be something you are not. Just my experience, not that I know anything.
necro wrote:Who ever came up with the advice "be yourself" is an absolute moron...
I strongly disagree. Unless you just want to f*ck a girl and be done with it, you'd better find someone who fits you, and you're not going to find anyone "real" for a relationship if you're pretending to be someone else. And even if you do, you'd be sure to screw it up some time.
You can try to change yourself though, to become a better person...
Edit: Hmm, hadn't seen KV's post yet, so I guess this is pretty redundant now
I also disagree ... there is no point in not being yourself as you will only have to keep up the 'act', which will become draining and only cause problems.
All you can do is be yourself. You will just have to wait, and one day someone might come along that is perfect for you.
"My world is Black & White. But if I blink fast enough, I see it in Grayscale."
Being yourself is all relative and can cause quite some doubt if you can recollect changes in your thinking (are you really being yourself now???). (At last for me it can. I don't like that fraise. Who else can you be??? )
But there is no act. If you play an act then you are somebody who's playing an act. People can even like it.
So I say relative because 99% of humanity isn't "him/herself" compared to some people I know. It's just a projection of one's own expactions (what someone else "should" be) on an observation of what someone seems to be ("is"). If those match you think someone is being themselve. Even liking people being themselves is an illusion, everyone always is themselves.
I say, let there be less judging and more being.
Just do what you want. You are what you like. Simplest, truest answer. Just hard not to get obstructed by anything.
Don't worry about people not liking you, not everybody fits into everybody's lifestyle, not a problem.
Or maybe I'm an idiot. Either way, this line of thought seems more right to me.
I agree... being yourself is who you should be... after all, lying to a person you care about is extremely wrong. Though, sometimes being yourself gets you into situations that you don't want to be in...
Which is better, to make yourself a mask to find some form of human kindness or bear your face to futher pain and hate? Further, how can you be much of anything when you feel completely empty?
the only way to be much of anything even if you're empty or full, is to have confidence that at some point people will show tolerance
optimists have done great things because of their positive outlooks, e.g. Ghandi
high school isn't the place to find alot of tolerance, and sure you may find a gf or bf, but who says that once they get to know you, they will still like you
they may have liked what they saw on the outside, but then they see the inside and they don't like it
also vice versa, they don't like the outside too much, but find the inside nice and well worth the outside
and of course they might like both inside and out
so if you have patience and optimism things will turn out alright
girls=time*money
time=money
girls=money*money
money is the root of all evil
girls=(evil^1/2)*(evil^1/2)
girls=(evil^1/2)^2
girls=evil
Many of us have lost people we cared about, knew, or even loved... Many of us handle that in out own ways... In turn, a good few of us have lost people we cared about, knew or even loved, because they took their own lives... And in turn, those good few took that in their own way... By now after reading this, a few of you can predict what I am going to say to some degree, others might be a bit shocked, and yet still others might be hurt, but that I care not about... About 2 years ago one of my good friends became severely depressed, his mother took him to see a psyciatrist. The psyciatrist suggest moving away from his school (he was tormented there, our school dosen't handle homosexual people well) and from Ohio altogether, so they moved, to Nevada. The real problem with my friend was his family, they yelled at him for doing nothing, for things he didn't do, and for things he couldn't change (like being homosexual). He got anything but better, we kept in touch for the most part... A week or so ago he told me to call him, and gave me the number, so I did. We talked like old times, about everything really, but I could tell something was wrong, we started to discuss him being depressed, and how he wanted to kill his mother (I convinced him that he wouldn't like jail too much, he's 18) and how he wanted it all to go away. We fought (well, not really, just talked back and forth over) him killing himself, I thought I convinced him not to. Well something happened over there (I'm not sure) and he just became even more depressed, and unknowingly to me, decended into his kitched to get a knife (I know this because he started to discuss how beautiful his knoves were in the evening sun). He went back to his room (I heard the door click) and we kept on talking, then he was slient for a few minutes, all I could here was a sharp inhale of breath... I figured he was messing around (he did earlier, I freaked then) again, but he wasn't... all I heard was him yelling into the hall "g'night all, you'll be seeing no more of me!" I then hurd a thump (assumingly next to the phone) and him wispering "good bye friend... you where the only thing keeping me here... to bad it wasn't enough." and he hung up, I tried calling back, but it came up busy... I finally got through this morning (pay phone) to his answering machine, the recorded message said his name, his birth and March 17th 2006...
Depression is quite powerful...its hard to believe that even in the darkest hours of life there is hope. Its hard for me to believe, but I know its true. I'm deeply sorry about your friend...i know how it feels; i've had it happen to me too. The important thing is to have something in your life thats worth living for. It may be hard to find, or easy to find. It just depends. And as much as you think it will help, suicide will never lead to anything good. There are alternate solutions. If your family is the cause of your depression, then run away or something. If its school, drop out. I know these things arent really good either, but better than dying and hurting people that care about you. And yes, there will always be someone out there that cares about you. I care about all of you here at MC. I may not know you, or not know you too well, but i will help every one of you if you needed it. Anyway, it hurts losing friends and loved ones. I know this all too well. But no matter how tough it gets, you just have to hang in there.
P.S. if any of you needs a sympathetic ear or anything, dont hesitate to come to me. I'll do my best to help you out.
And what if there are so many reasons, that IF you'd find a solution for all of them, it'd still be impossible to live this way? Like, if you're having both problems at school and home, and you move out of your home and drop out of school, what'll you do? If you're younger than 18 years old, you're in deep shit... You'd almost be better of commiting suicide... Life is just too complicated... And CDI, that sucks...
If you're under 18 and you run away and drop out, find a friend to live with or something. no matter what, theres always a better alternative than suicide.
)
Either way, this line of thought seems more right to me.
